Day 3 – 30 Days of Submission: Day 3 – How do you know you are submissive or have the potential to be submissive? How do you feel when you express your submission?

Day 3 – How do you know you are submissive or have the potential to be submissive? How do you feel when you express your submission?

I know that I am submissive because simply, I would rather be told what to do, then tell others what to do. Even as a child, I did not want to be the leader in a group. I was more of a follower. I enjoy the rewards and praises I get for submitting. I like to feel treasured for the care and submission that I provide. I enjoy feeling like a protected little girl. I get butterflies when I’m being treated this way. I adore being told I’m a good girl. I love praise. I think one reason I love being submissive is because then I can be more sure that I am doing the right thing. My Master told me that it was up to him to see that I do my job of being submissive. Not sure if he really meant it the way I understand it, but that makes me feel more sure, rather than unsure of myself. When I’m being ordered around it makes me wet and hot. It doesn’t even matter of it is sexual or not, most of the time.

On the other hand, in my job, I am not submissive at all. In fact, I am in charge and I have two assistants that work under me. However, even in that position, I tend to work more as a team player than as a director in charge. The only way, I guess, that you could tell that I am the one in charge is because of the information that I deliver. Anyway… even in my job, I have NO desire to work in a position higher than where I am. I mean, I do have ambitions, but they are more of increasing knowledge and being more diverse, than of moving up.

At home though, not only do I crave being told what to do, I will tell myself what to do if no one does it for me. For example, I will diligently make myself lists and try to adhere to them fanatically. However, I mostly miserably fail. LOL I think that is because I have no consequence for myself if I fail. haha.

On the other, other hand. (How many hands do I have?) I relish doing things I want to do. So, even though I’m submissive, I don’t want to do what I don’t want to do.
What a quandary!

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