Wikipedia says –

Erotic asphyxiation or breath control play is the intentional restriction of oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal.

I love the feeling of my Master’s hands around my throat. He has never restricted my oxygen for any length of time. Apparently, if a person comes near to passing out, then the sexual arousal is heightened. I’m not sure that I would really want to pass out. I just like the feeling of loss of control.

Anal Plugs

An anal plug is basically a dildo for the ass. It is either to increase pleasure and/or orgasm and/or it is for Dominance/submission expressions.

I’ve discussed some about Assplay

This post is about anal or butt plugs and my experience or not. I’ve had very, very little experience with this. My Master did get me an anal plug long ago. It was considered a “beginners” butt plug. It was very small and narrow and very flexible and slick feeling. The first time my Master put it in me, I was sure it felt very much bigger than it was. And he wanted me to wear it around that evening, and I did, but I remembering feeling afraid it was going to fall out?? It didn’t lol.

I think that this is one of those things that I might get more used to if I were made to use one. That is totally up to my Master, though. From what I’ve read, it also might help with not making ass fucking so painful, because you might be stretched a bit, if you wore one often? That is what I’ve gathered from reading.

As for the Dominance/submission factor? It really makes me feel submissive to think about either an anal/butt plug or being fucked in the ass. I think it is because I don’t really want to, but I’m being made to do it. Being made to do something that I don’t want to, that is sexually a turn-on for someone else (My Master), really, really turns me on. 🙂

Age Play

Age Play as explained by wikipedia –

Ageplay or age play is a form of roleplaying in which an individual acts or treats another as if they were a different age. Ageplay is role playing between adults, and involves consent from all parties…Ageplay can enhance power dynamics, and allow a partner to feel more comfortable with their dominance or submission…Ageplay is not considered pedophilia or related to pedophilia by professional psychologists. Individuals who ageplay are not attracted to children, but instead enjoy portraying children, or enjoy childlike elements typical of children present in adults.
Sexual ageplay itself does not involve the sexual attraction to biologically underage people.

I enjoy age play. I like feeling small and protected and taken care of. 🙂

Ritual or Routine

Is it RITUAL or is it ROUTINE?

Merriam Webster says:

RITUAL – done as part of a ceremony or ritual

: always done in a particular situation and in the same way each time

ROUTINE -: a regular way of doing things in a particular order

That doesn’t really help much, because they seem to be very similar. After reading around on the internet, I came to a few conclusions. I see ROUTINE as different than RITUAL in the meaning behind it.

For example, it is ROUTINE that before I go to bed, I brush my teeth first, then floss, then rinse with mouth wash. I do it the same way each time and I don’t feel right unless I do each one that way. But I would not call it a RITUAL because it is just for the purpose of cleaning my teeth and mouth and giving me fresh breath.

On the other hand, every morning I have another ROUTINE, that is, indeed, a RITUAL. I get out of bed before my Master each and every morning (or nap) and I go make him espresso in his Italian espresso pot on the stove. I do it the same way each time. I think of him as I’m doing it. I am so happy when we have Starbucks Sumatra coffee to put in the pot because he loves it best. I’m less so when we have run out and are using the Folgers. I rinse the pot with warm water and then fill it with cold, because that is supposed to make better coffee. I put the stove on number 8 so it will boil and percolate, but not overheat the rubber gasket (hopefully). After the coffee pot sputters its announcement that it is done, I immediately remove it, thinking of not wanting it to be too hot for my Man. Then the most important – I use one of his favorite mugs ONLY and I pour a very tiny stream into the cup. This cools it off faster. I add just the right amount of whole milk. Then I carry it to him and ask him if he is ready for his coffee. The meaning behind this RITUAL is very important to me. I’ve been doing it for a very, very long time. Even before we got married, he would have me to make him a cup of coffee and set it on the counter and then make my own cup. This cup of coffee was symbolic of my serving him in my mind, even though he wasn’t present. Now, I’m so happy to be able to do this in person. 🙂

So, I think a routine can be a ritual if it has MEANING behind it other than just a thoughtless act.

Domestic Servitude


According to wikipedia -“In BDSM, servitude refers to performing personal tasks for their dominant partner, as part of their submissive role in a BDSM relationship.
In domestic servitude roles, the submissive can receive pleasure and satisfaction from performing personal services for their dominant, such as serving as a butler, waitress, chauffeur, maid or houseboy.”

Am I into Domestic Servitude? Yes, I think I am. I do like to serve in this way and it makes me feel good. Playing the part of waitress or maid would serve two purposes in my opinion. First the purpose of pleasing the Master, and fulfilling the need to serve by the submissive. Secondly, the purpose of keeping the house clean and meals prepared. Unfortunately, I cannot do a very good job of this at all because I also work a full time job and my energy levels are kind of low. I hate that. I really wish I could take part in this more. 😦 Also, it is way more fulfilling for me to be “made” to do these things, rather than just knowing that I should do these things.

Because of the stress of life, my Master has suggested that we take on a third person – another submissive who has this as a main kink and to become part of our household. He has always talked of having a second submissive. I have always been jealous of this except that if it were someone who really and truly enjoyed being with us both and could be a very good companion, it might be a real enhancement to our relationship. In our case, since I work full time, the second submissive would have the full time job of housekeeping and serving meals. And then also be submissive to my Master, but not to me. We’ll see what the future may bring.

Am I a Slacker Slave?

Why do I slack on my chores/rules?

Honestly, I don’t know the answer to that question. Sometimes, I’m just tired. I work and have a long commute so that is my excuse for not blogging every night this week. Not sure if that is a good excuse or not?

On the other hand, maybe it is because I know that I can get away with it. I mean, I want to be extra special and good, but sometimes I’m just not motivated enough to do it. I suspect that my Master actually feels the same way. He would LIKE to enforce the rules, but sometimes maybe he’s just not motivated enough to do it.

I don’t like the thought of being a slacker slave, though. 😦

Day 30 of 30 Days of Submission: Submission Needs

Day 30 – Is your need to submit being met? If not, or if your situation changed, do you think that you could continue in your life and still be happy/content if you were never able to express your submission in the way that feels best to you again? What makes submission special to you?

I would like to have more submission in my life, I think. I’m happy with my relationship with my Master and he feels the same way, so I know we are on the right track. I do not think that I would be as happy if I were not in a relationship where I could be submissive. I like the way I feel when I’m being treated as a submissive by my Master. I crave it emotionally and I crave it sexually. I crave the feeling of being “taken care of” and I am attracted to Dominant figures, so it is a fit. At least I know that my Master and I “fit”. 🙂

Day 29 of 30 Days of Submission: Pain and Humiliation

Day 29 – Is pain or humiliation (spankings for example) a part of your submission? What is your relationship to it? Do you embrace it as a part of your submission, tolerate it as necessary or have some other type of relationship with it?

Most definitely. I found myself to be turned on by spanking before I ever knew what BDSM or submission was. That aspect of myself is what actually was the link to finding myself submissive. As I began to explore the net and search out spanking, I began to come across BDSM and that, in turn, led to the realization that I was submissive and began to explore BDSM.

I enjoy a certain amount of pain and humiliation because it makes me feel more submissive which makes me more turned on which makes me want more pain and humiliation. Plus, I really want to please my Master and when i see that he enjoys administering pain and humiliation, then it turns me on and makes me feel more submissive and thus more turned and so on and so on.

I don’t enjoy punishment which I find different than torture. Torture is for turn on for either or both a Dom/sub, while punishment is administered to sub by Dom due to infraction and isn’t meant to be a turn-on. I do not enjoy punishment at all. First, the fact that my Master is not happy with me makes me pretty upset and so I’m not turned on at all. Plus, he administers punishment more quickly and harshly than the slow build up of torture.

I do totally embrace the pain and humiliation that is part of my submission to my Master.

Day 28 of 30 Days of Submission: Criticized

Day 28 – Has your submission ever let you down? Have you ever been criticized for your submission? Have you ever regretted being or feeling submissive in a moment or in a relationship? Have you ever looked back and realized you made a mistake and how did you handle your submission going forward from that.

I can’t really think of a time where my submission has let me down, no.

Although we are more or less a regular couple in real life, we do carry over BDSM to some extent, though i think rather subtly. I think I appear to the outside as though I’m more or less either a princess or as someone who has a REALLY bossy, controlling husband. I prefer to think that they think I’m treated as a princess, but sometimes i get the…..”your husband drives you to work EVERY day? Don’t you ever drive? That would drive me crazy!” I take that as a criticism, but I try to play it off as if I’m a princess, which is how I really, really feel. I say, “Why should I drive when I can be chauffeured? I would much rather play on my iphone than pay attention to the road!” My Master takes very good care of me.

I love feeling submissive, so no, i don’t ever regret it. The only thing I do regret is some of the awful “chats” that I had with so called, ‘masters’, when I was first exploring the net. I thought to myself….”this is stupid!” And it was, until I met my Master. I feel so very, very lucky that I met him. I can’t imagine what would have happened to me. I was soo so gullible. I feel sorry for girls not as lucky as i, who in exploring might get into trouble. 😦 Hopefully, they do their research because there is a lot of info on the net now about BDSM. There didn’t used to be.

I’m sure that at some point in my future, I may be criticized for my submission. My feeling is that when that time comes, i will probably just dismiss it, because I will feel that the criticizer just does not know what they are talking about or does not understand. I feel fortunate that there are a lot of bloggers out there who validate how I feel by what they write. Thank-you, Sex Bloggers! I’m grateful. 🙂

Bark like a dog?

ThoughtsFromHisSlut tells about barking like a dog. She talks about how she feels stupid but is lost in being his and therefore doing as he requests.

I know exactly how she feels. I HATE it when my Master tells me to bark like a dog. It is soo humiliating. I always feel my face getting red before I even open my mouth. I think the first time he had me to do that, I was a little tipsy, so it didn’t seem that bad, not really. But, my Master likes to tease me. He likes watching me be a little uncomfortable. Maybe it is partly because my face turns so red, so quickly – along with my neck and chest. Of course that also happens when I’m turned on, but that doesn’t mean I like it when he makes me do that. Sometimes I am so into my submission that I will really do just about anything with the right coaxing from my Master. I guess that includes barking like a dog. (pout)