Day 26 – What are the qualities you seek in a dominant partner and why? Are some qualities deal-breakers as in “must” haves or “must not” have?
I believe a Dominant should really love and care about his submissive. I believe that he should understand that his love and care for his submissive will result in her love and care and submissiveness to him. I believe communications is at the top of the list. If a Dom will talk to his sub, they will learn so much about each other. Reading and discussing blogs can open many doors for discussion, as can blogging itself. I believe that trust is paramount. Whatever she has stated that her hard limits are, he must not pass those. If he really wants her to not have certain hard limits, then he might talk with her about it, but never, never break her trust. If the sub cannot completely trust him to take care of her then she won’t be able to fully submit. I think that a Dom must go slow in introducing her to his ways of Domination. If he goes slowly, then not only will be trained as he sees fit, but also she will fall deeper and deeper into submission. I think if he is successful, then she will want more and more, not less Domination.
Every Dominant will make mistakes. Every Dominant will wish he were a better Dom. But, so also, will every sub wish she were a better sub. No one is perfect, but if a sub has trust in her Dom, and he truly perceives her as a treasure, by making communication a key part of their life, then they can grow together in their relationship.