A Couple Hooks Up With a Guy

Yep. That’s what we did last night. My Master will tell me that we may have plans tonight. But he doesn’t tell me what/where/details. I hate/love that. On the one hand, it forces me to trust him. On the other hand, I want to know the juicy details.

So I start to get ready. Shower, shave, paint my toenails a new blue color. CUTE! And then sit at my computer to await instructions. After some time, he says that the first plans fell through. We were supposed to meet up with a guy whose wife was out of town, but he had a free hall pass. (Really? Who does that?) But, my Master said that the wife was going to call and chat to verify. OK..that sounds better. But, anyway, he went to a bar first and it was getting too late, so my Master dropped that.

It was getting later and later and honestly I was getting tired. 2am is pretty late. I drank a stevia cola for the caffeine along with my beer to calm my nerves. Ok, he says, we have plans are you still up to it? Sure I say. Because I am a Good Girl. I am my Daddy’s Good Little Girl and I know it will please him.

We head to this other guys house whose wife is also “out of town”. I’m leery, but ok. We meet the guy, go to the bedroom. I suck his cock and my Master fucks me. I REALLY enjoyed the fuck from my Master. The guy, well, he was ok, I guess. He was really nervous and was about to cum the moment I started to suck him, so I had to really back off on my cock sucking skills as he couldn’t take it. When finally he let go and came in my mouth, my first thought was…..wow, he is really salty!!!! Then my Master wrapped it up and we left. THAT was a QUICKIE, INDEED!!!

After we left, my Master said that he got the vibe that the guy was maybe not actually on a hall pass from his wife. We don’t want to get into issues where everybody, whether there or not, is not consenting. I’m glad my Master feels that way.

He was proud of me! (blush and smile)

Day 16 of 30 Days of Submission: Day 16 – Have you found your submission has changed with different partners/relationships? If you’re involved with partners of both sexes, does your submission relate or change based on gender or does it depend on the person?

When I first started exploring the net and BDSM, specifically Dom/sub, I talked to a few “Masters”, but they didn’t seem like they knew what they were talking about.  It wasn’t until I met my Master that I knew that this was the real deal and that he was a real person, too. I was very intrigued and he seemed very intrigued with me.  We took it very slowly and I fell totally in love with him.  We are married now and I honestly can’t imagine it any other way, or with any other person.  I know that my submission to anyone else, male or female, would be at his discretion and it most definitely would be different, in that it would be secondary to my submission to my Master.  Actually, no, not secondary, but rather conditionally, based on what my Master had set forth.

Day 12 of 30 Days of Submission: Day 12 – Do you include financial submission within the definition of your own submission and if yes, how does it manifest itself? If no, is there a particular reason why? Are you familiar with the concepts of financial submission? Do you have an opinion about financial submission in general?

Day 12 – Do you include financial submission within the definition of your own submission and if yes, how does it manifest itself? If no, is there a particular reason why? Are you familiar with the concepts of financial submission? Do you have an opinion about financial submission in general?

Yes, I do include financial submission as part of my submission to my Master.
How does it manifest itself? First, he takes care of ALL financial matters. My paycheck is autodeposited into our joint account and he writes all the bills. Furthermore, he does ALL the shopping. Occasionally, I will go shopping, too, to keep him company or if there is something in particular that I want to shop for. (with his permission, of course). I don’t enjoy shopping unless I have the money to spend on something that I really want. Otherwise, it tends to just stress me. I have a duplicate of the debit card in my possession, but I NEVER purchase anything without his permission. Actually, it is more likely that I let him know that I wish for or need something and then he makes the decision as to whether to buy it or not. In fact, he drives me everywhere that I go and so I’m never in a store without him. More often than not, he buys me what I ask for, but I never ask for anything extravagant. I rarely ever ask for anything that I don’t feel I need. He rarely ever gives me money and if he does, it is just to keep in my purse as emergency. (Usually then given to him for something I feel that I need when it comes to the proverbial “end of the month”.) He also constantly buys me little treats, or even more expensive and cool gadgets and so forth. If we are together, he tries to encourage me to grab a drink or a snack or often has it in the car when he picks me up from work. Yes, he drives me to and from work…but that’s another post!

I don’t really mind too much giving up total financial control, but it has its pros and cons and ups and downs. I was very eager for him to take over the bills when we got married, because I had been married previously and had always done the bills, but it was stressful. I was rarely ever late on bills and really knew how to start getting ahead. It took a lot of trust to give this up, but even moreso to let it go when things aren’t handled like I’d feel like I would do. Even at that, it still is not enough for me to want to go back to doing bills myself. I also used to be very frugal, I felt, in my spending, utilizing sales and coupons and so forth. My Master/husband has a very different way of doing things and though I’m not always happy with the way he does things, I am happy that doing so makes him happy and I don’t have to worry my pretty little head about it! LOL He wants the control, therefore I submit it. I have learned a lot in this journey and have learned many ways to cope with basically, my loss of control. I find that having my needs met, really is the key. If my own needs are met, then I don’t feel the need to want to control things. How do I get my needs met as far as finances go? I try to respectfully tell my Master what I feel my needs are. This is hard because I feel guilty for wanting to express what I want. But, as my Master put it, I am to express my needs and he will decide if and how I shall receive it. That really takes a lot of pressure off of me, if I can align with this thinking. And then I can use my energy to focus on the things that will please him. Win/win!

Day 11 of 30 Days of Submission: Day 11 – Do you include service as a part of your expectations of your submission? How do you define service? What does it mean to you? If not, what is it about the concept of service that is not for you?

Day 11 – Do you include service as a part of your expectations of your submission? How do you define service? What does it mean to you? If not, what is it about the concept of service that is not for you?

Yes, service is included in my submission to my Master/Dom. What does that entail? Basically, I consider service to be anything that I DO for him.

I service him sexually in whatever way he pleases, whenever he pleases. The range is from any sexual act to allowing him complete access to all my body. Aside from a night of fun sex, which is anticipated, it may also entail waking me up to fuck or suck his cock. Or it may entail him stopping me in the hallway to pull aside my shirt and fondle or suck my breasts. Or perhaps pulling my pants down while I’m doing dishes to smack me a few times on the ass. Service, to me, could also mean my having sex with whom he chooses.

I also service him by other more domestic duties, such as making and bringing him coffee, making a sandwich to his liking or serving him a piece of cake, in just the right way with the the frosting facing just the right direction on the plate.

I look forward to performing more service for my Master as he directs. 🙂

February 2014 – New Rules/Chores

As I’ve mentioned in other posts, our focus on BDSM has slackened over the past while, but we’ve talked extensively about how we really both want to get back into focus. (Even with the slack, our Dom/sub relationship never goes away. I still do certain things such as ask permission for most things and serve him coffee in bed each morning and after naps. And in the bedroom, our sex usually contains some sort of BDSM play even if it is nothing more than following orders.) So, this past week resulted in a new short list of chores for me to focus on. Here they are:

1. Physical Appearance – My Master wants me to focus on making myself as physically appealing to him as I can.

(I always do this, anyway, I feel, but with the renewed attention to the directive, I do feel like I should put more focus into it. I had started going to the gym and then we moved. I have a really long commute now, so not sure if I can get into that right now, or not. But that doesn’t mean I can’t watch my diet more. I will! Another things is my nails. My Master likes it when I have long nails. But, I cut them off about 2 1/2 years ago because it was such a hassle. I also cannot, to save my life, paint polish without making a complete mess. And going to a professional is expensive. I have decided to compromise by starting to let my nails grow and wear only clear polish. I will ask him to determine if/when I should start having my nails done again, professionally. I am also trying to wear more makeup on my off days. He tells me that I look beautiful without makeup, but you know how it is!)

2. Blog daily.

3. Do first, then ask. My Master wants me to show in some way that I am moving into the direction he has stated before as he puts it, arguing, or as I put, giving info/input. This will be hard for me, but I can do it.

4. Inspections. This entails me standing before him naked and turning as he looks me over.

Okay, so 4. I’m ready for more, please! 🙂

Edited: I must add that there are many, many rules/chores that I do, by habit, since we have been together for many years. I wanted to add them here:

I make espresso with cream and serve my Master in bed each morning and after naps.
I ask permission before doing most things, particularly if they are not normal routine activities.
I am never to raise my voice to him, nor slam doors or cabinets.
I ask each day as to which perfume I should wear each day. I have about 8 perfumes to choose from.
I always tell my Master when I am getting tired and ready for bed.
He rarely goes to bed when I do, as he is an insomniac, but he does tuck me in and kiss me goodnight and joins me later.
I always walk on my Master’s right side. ALWAYS..it really is habit.
I must tell him if I masturbate in the shower.
No saying, “whatever”.
I always tell him that I’m thinking of taking a shower and he will tell me to go ahead or to wait.
I never leave the house without permission and rarely without him. He drives me everywhere. (Not that I can’t drive. I even have my own car, which we usually drive because it gets better gas mileage. But he prefers to drive me and I prefer to ride anyway.)
My Master takes care of all the bills.
My Master does all the shopping. I write on the list, or tell, or text him what I need or want and he decides what to buy. He pretty much gets me whatever I ask for, but I’m pretty frugal and don’t ask for expensive things. Sometimes I go shopping and sometimes I don’t.
I wear a Cartier Love Bracelet, which is never removed and is similar to a collar.
I ask him daily, at least once, if there is anything he wishes me to do that evening.

I guess I already have a pretty big list, don’t I?

What are the pros and cons of sharing your Master? – A blog post dictated by my Master.

My last post on this subject said that I was going to post the answer on tomorrow after I had thought about it. Needless to say, I continued to think about it. I’ve also been busy and not taken the time to write because I was sick with a bad cold for a week and then spent a week trying to catch up at work. But, my Master reminded me that I had better get busy with the posts, and my other chores, because the week is sliding by.
The pros and cons of sharing my Master. Where to start on this post? First background information. I have always known that my Master would love to have 2 or maybe 3 submissives. We talked about it way at the beginning of our getting to know each other phase. I remember telling him that I didn’t know if I could handle that – not being the ONLY one. He told me that he would never add someone until I was ready. Well, I thought, I will NEVER be ready, so I guess I don’t need to worry about that! As time progressed, I always knew that some of my Master’s great fantasies included other women. Before I met my Master, I had never had any kind of sexual experience with another woman. And then, gradually, gradually, over the time we have been together, I guess he (My Master) has really slowly put his plan into action. He’s so good, you know, that I never really saw it coming. But all that is another, or several other posts.
I think I will use the initials of PLAYING WITH OTHERS to help me discuss the PROS of this issue. I’m sure that I could think of a million things, both pro and con, but I’m going to go with this, I think.
PRO P – Being submissive, I really, really want to PLEASE my Master. Since I know that he wants to have other pussy, other than my own, then sharing my Master would definitely be a way to please him. It is quite amazing to myself to realize that I really and truly grow deeper into submission all the time, which shows itself to me in different ways, but one most significant is that I want to please him more and more as time goes by. He makes me want to, I think.
PRO L – I LOVE my Master and I know that he LOVES me. Because of this, I know that he would never do anything to break my trust in him. He promised long ago to take care of his precious treasure and so far he has kept his word and been the most awesome of all Masters, not to mention most awesome guy of all!
PRO A – APPEAL – There really is an appeal to this for me, too. I love sex, what can I say. And my Master says that he doesn’t want other sex without me. So if I can be involved, in some way, in all sex, even with another? Then it’s win/win for me, right?
PRO Y – YOURS – I’m his. enough said.
PRO I – INCREASED self-confidence with my abilities. When I please my Master, my self-confidence improves. When I submit to sex with another man or woman, per my Master, if I do a good job, as in I give an awesome blowjob, or eat some pussy to make some other girl happy, then my own self-confidence improves! After meeting up with another couple to have sex, and they want to meet again, I know that part of it is because my Master is really good, but also, I know that I have appeal, too. That’s especially nice when I hear compliments from the other couple to tell me that I have done a good job.
PRO N – NEW – new things are often fun and exciting!
PRO G – GOING OUT – Getting dressed up to go out and play is like going on a date with someone new as well as with your best friend! I love to get dressed up and go out. And I’m not talking about dressing up in BDSM gear, although, that sounds like it would be fun! I’m just talking about the anticipation of going out on a Friday or Saturday night, dressing up and looking good, or trying to look good. It’s a lot of fun!
PRO W – WIN/WIN – If I get to have fun, and at the same time, so does my Master, then it really is a win/win!
PRO I – INCREASED SELF-CONFIDENCE with my appearance. When I’m told by my Master that I am desirable, it is soo incredibly awesome. It is definitely multiplied when someone else confirms it. It makes me feel really good, when someone that I sucked off, tells my husband that it is the BEST blowjob that they’ve ever had! WOW! That really is a confidence booster! And if they talk about remembering their hands in my soft hair? Well, you KNOW that makes me want to go buy conditioner rather than the 2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner? Right??
PRO T – Man, if you can trust your guy to have sex with another woman and STILL want you the best? Then, really, REALLY you must have TRUST.
PRO H – HANGUPS – honestly, some hangups go out the window. Like how, for example? Well, I’m, shall we say, not in my 20’s. And if a 20 year old wants to fuck me, then I’m suddenly a MILF! That hangup? ….out the window!
PRO O – OTHERS?- actually, there can be a lot of fun in others… as I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing, due to my Master!
PRO T – TAKEN – Doesn’t that word just make you wet? Well, it does me. I love the thought of being MADE to submit. But, only because I have such trust in my Master. It’s taken me awhile to see what others meant when they said that. I mostly didn’t believe it. Time changes things, however.
PRO E – EXCITING – It really is exciting to go out with someone new. Remember the feeling? If you are in a stable relationship and have been for awhile, then you know remember how exciting it can be to date. It also is a drag to go home and wonder and wonder about where you stand and what the future holds. But if you already have that stability and yet can still have exciting times together with new experiences…it is simply awesome!
PRO R – REAL LIFE – After going out for a kinky night of fun, you then have to get to real life – back to job, maybe kids, your same old, same old. But if you can reminisce in your real life about how much fun you had, what you did and didn’t like about your last date with others, it can be enhancing! I say that because, my Master and I have had some awesome sex AFTER we came back from dates!
PRO S – SEX – And really, how can I resist that…especially if I must!

And now, the CONS, which are basically FEARS:
CON P – Fear of PHYSICAL PAIN – Being into BDSM and knowing there is a broad range of SM, I fear getting hurt. Not to get me wrong, I do like some pain. More than I used to think that I did. But I also don’t want to be seriously hurt, nor damaged. And I have an extremely sensitive clit, so direct stimulation can be painful. This is a real fear, if you are restrained. HOWEVER, my Master has done a very good job of protecting me when I’ve been with others (which has really not been that many experiences). He is very good at talking and getting into specifics before we play and to date we have played with more who were not into BDSM and none who were actually into s&m. For to me to submit to sex with others is me being dominated by him, so this kink can be satisfied without having for me to being submitted to another master or mistress.
CON L – LOSING love, affection, time together – another fear – that I might lose my Master’s love or affection to another. Again, he has stated that he doesn’t want sex without me, but I still have that fear.
CON A – AFFECTION for another – basically jealousy. Seeing my Master show affection to another can have conflicting emotions. On the one hand, I am often happy to see him show affection to someone because I know that it makes them feel good, just like I like it when I receive affection from someone else. But, still, the pangs of jealousy attack. And I’m also aware that this is a plus for my Master because he likes to see me a little jealous.
CON Y – YEARS from now – how will that play out? I fear this future because I am in my late 40’s now and age is not pretty. Men usually are able to “have” younger counterparts because it is socially and culturally acceptable. Older men are seen as distinguished and good looking when bald and/or gray. I myself am attracted to all kinds, including bald and gray. The funny thing is – my Master is SEVERAL years younger than me. Someday, it will be quite a bit more noticeable than it is now. Look at Hugh Heffner, the playboy mansion owner and mogul. Not only is he still considered sexy, but he has tons and tons of young girlfriends and has continued to marry over the years! There is no female counterpart in the business of sex.
CON I – ILLNESS – I am totally not interested in getting a transmittable disease or virus. ugh…enough said. That is the advantage of playing with couples, I think.
CON N – NEAR OR FAR – Sometimes we have gone to play with others quite some distance away. This is safer as far as the likelihood of meeting a coworker or something. Because I AM in the closet about my kinks. But driving far away to meet up with others is a pain, no doubt.
CON G – GAG – ok, so I have a gag reflex. I have been told that I give awesome blowjobs. I like that. I fear I may come upon more or less a rival that might not have a gag reflex and again, jealousy! Sometimes, I think that being able to give awesome head is a plus for me even if I feel bad about myself for other reasons. I really don’t want that taken away, but inevitably, playing with others will lend itself to eventually meeting someone with great ability also, or maybe even better.
CON W – WAKING to find something to make me jealous. So far in our play, we have only played for an evening. We have not spent the night anywhere. I know my Master has talked about getting a sub to live in. One that would be a girlfriend for me and a girlfriend for him, so to speak. I don’t know how that would EVER work out, because honestly I can’t see somebody wanting a place like that, but I guess there must be out there somewhere. But, in any case, we have often discussed, because I have asked, how certain things would work in his envisioning. We have discussed how a live-in sub would work – kind of like a roommate. I’ve asked about sleeping arrangements. He has talked about having a sub on each side of him. We used to have a king-sized bed, so that might have worked, I guess, but then I’ve often wondered how I would feel if I woke to see the two of them caressing or having sex? Or waking to see the two of them asleep, but with arms around each other or something else exclusionary. I know my Master tries to alleviate my fears, but jealousy is there.
CON I – INDIFFERENCE – Another fear. What if my Master started to see me with indifference? Or what if the other sub saw me indifferently? jealousy.
CON T – TEASING – My Master likes to tease me. It is true. However, sometimes teasing can be unknowingly hurtful or just to the right of jealousy.
CON H – HUMILIATE – I know that my Master actually enjoys some humiliation of me. And I also know that he refrains because he does not want to hurt me. I can appreciate this venue of domination. I’m afraid, as jealousy once again rears it’s ugly head, that humiliation might become more prominent and perhaps might even come from another sub geared toward me. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I might even enjoy it, because of the vulnerability factor, the smallness feeling factor. But, I also know that my Master thinks of me as his treasure, so I know that he loves me despite a humiliating scene. I’m not sure about another sub. Or what if the other sub started receiving what I thought should be for me?
CON O – ORGASMS – You would think that this would be in the pro section. Here is the thing. I take a very long time to reach orgasm. On the one hand, it makes for awesome orgasms. On the other hand, I’m jealous of those that reach it so easily, even if it only appears to be a small orgasm. What if in playing with others, I see that happening and become extremely jealous. I guess in this particular instance, I am thinking of a long-term second sub, because when we play with others, I do not usually come, even though I enjoy myself. I do love to see others come. I just don’t know how I would feel if there was a live in sub who was constantly “outdoing” me, so to speak.
CON T – TEMPER – I often get on my Master’s nerves. I don’t like it when I make him lose his temper. He is never violent or anything. It just makes me feel so bad. I worry that all my insecurities will wear on him and then he might be likely to lose his temper.
CON H – HEARING – One time, when we were playing with others, I kept hearing my Master talking about how awesome this woman was that he was fucking. I did have a good time, but felt uneasy and very, very jealous. Come to find out, later, that he was actually talking about me, but I didn’t know. It was one of the first times that we played with another couple and we were all together on one bed and when he said “look at that ass!” and things like that, I thought he was talking about her. I tried to be happy about that, but I was so freaking jealous! He said that he had said a lot of stuff like that to try and show me that he was including me in his sex and even was touching me a lot, but I was not even aware of his touch.
CON E – EXCITEMENT without me. Again, the jealousy issue. I get jealous when even hearing about my Master talking or texting with another. To his credit, he has reassured me that he is just trying to make the other person feel good, as he should.
CON R – RIVAL – I worry about anyone becoming a rival for my Master’s attentions. Sharing is not the same as someone wanting it ALL, so to speak. I, do want it ALL, but am not willing to share it ALL with someone else. I fear that someday, someone will come along, perhaps thinking that they want to be a second sub, but then decide they want it ALL. And what if, at that time, my Master agrees.
CON S – SEX without me. I know, jealousy – the root of most fears!

Well, that wraps it up…my pros and cons of sharing my Master or playing with others. I kind of sense that Sharing my Master might entail more of a second sub aspect, whereas, playing with others, might be more of a play type thing. I tried to cover both aspects. Any thoughts out there?

Day 6: Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy

I don’t think that I have any one particular overriding fantasy.  I enjoy basically any kind of control over me.  I particularly think about being controlled in public, though usually far away from where I live to prevent running into coworkers or family or neighbors.  In these fantasies, I often imagine that I am wearing sexy simple clothing such as a skirt and tank or tank dress and for some reason, my Master is not pleased with me, even if it is something that I didn’t do on purpose, and as punishment he might make me lift my skirt to reveal no panties and a smooth pussy.  As he berates me, he spanks my pussy to my total humiliation, particularly since someone could easily see, increasing my humiliation.  However, I comply because I must.  I want to please my Master as well as not make him angrier – this, a fear, that increases the wetness of my pussy.  I am further humiliated by the fact that I cannot help but be aroused, wet, and wanting to cum.

I also fantasize about my Master spanking or whipping or otherwise torturing me for his pleasure only.  Of course I want/need to be punished when I disobey or displease my Master (and he doesn’t do this enough), but also when he just wants to!  Perhaps he is stressed out or mad at someone else, but tells me that he must punish me in order to relieve his stress or because he is displeased with someone/something else.  I feel this as serving even more so!  And since I love to serve in this manner, it is a huge turnon.

What do you think?